Anonymous asked: Dear squeak, I need your advice. When the world seems cold, and harsh, when you feel like there's no sun shine, or if it's constantly pouring... When you feel like, no matter what you do, you will always fail BECAUSE you are you. When you feel like you can't make your dreams come true, no matter how hard you try... What can you do to make your self feel better? To stop crying, because it's just, so hard to smile all the time...
Well, generally in my experience,the best thing to do is talk to someone. Even if you both happen to be miserable, it helps. Finding comfort in another person can be extremely helpful for symptoms of depression. Support is a must. In the immortal words of Lemony Snicket:
“Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the world, and that nobody loves them now and that nobody will ever love them, and that they will never have a decent night’s sleep again and will spend their lives wandering blearily around a loveless landscape, hoping desperately that their circumstances will improve, but suspecting, in their heart of hearts, that they will remain unloved forever. The best thing to do in these circumstances is to wake somebody else up, so that they can feel this way, too.”
But I do understand that often, this isn’t an option, whether it be that your depression has kept you from making the meaningful connections you feel that you need, or that your situation, location, or place in life provides you with little in the way of friendship I offer you this.
Take a moment, be by yourself, and don’t try to stop crying. Just cry, just weep for a moment, let all your worries and fears and doubts flow through your mind for a second. Take them in front of you, and let yourself feel for a moment or two. It hurts, but holding it in just makes it a slow ache. Crying is good for you, it releases hormones that help deal with the pain. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not asking you to wallow in your sadness, just maybe set aside some time to work through the emotions you’ve been holding down, and don’t hide your reactions to them.
BUT and this is a big but, don’t let the thoughts you’re reacting to be that ‘You’re stupid’ or ‘You’re ugly’ or ‘Un-loved’ that’s the depression talking, and that’s nonsense. Just take a minute and think about the real, core reasons for those feelings, and let them have a moment with you.
Then, once that is done, think if any of those things mattered five years ago, or if they will matter five years from now. Some of them might, if it’s the death of a pet or a family member, or a trauma, it will stay with you, but you will adapt. You will change. Are you the person you were five years ago? One year ago? A week ago?
You’re not, and the person you are tomorrow could be anyone, that is your choice. So after you’ve had a moment, invited your sorrow in for tea, take another small moment in your life and whisper to yourself ‘This too shall pass’. Because it will, whenever your thoughts get dark, acknowledge them, react, release, and remember that no matter how bad it seems right now, unless you’ve got a body in your trunk, things will get better.
Look to the person you’ll be tomorrow, and remember to love the person you are today.
That is my advice.